Mm… that anon put me in a better mood. Thank you, whoever you are.
All the sudden, you see yourself feeling something that you never felt before. And it is a strong feeling, something that devastates all the other feelings. It’s almost like a certainty, and you are so sure, almost like knowing you’re going to die right there. These thoughts and these feelings have always been running around my head, but they are getting stronger now, it’s like they’re coming alive, they are not in my head anymore.
You made me cry. Thank you for these words. I don’t know why is harder for us to believe in compliments than insults. But, I’ll try to believe in your words, anonymous person. Thank you.
Being yelled at, being told that you’re stupid and useless… that wasn’t a good way to end this weekend. I wish someone could tell me how I am, what I am, who I am… is there a real me? Or I’m just this piece of shit that people see?
A friend told me that if I want to be loved, I should loved myself first. That’s what all the people say, right? But, how can I love myself when all I can hear is: “you are stupid”, “you’re ugly”, “you’re useless”. And, on top of all that, the people I cared about the most… well, I guess they started to feel the same way. Every day get worst. I really don’t have any reason to exist, I’m not valuable for anyone, not even to myself.